My friend Ryan recently wrote a blog article about posting ads on craigslist, using my shop as an example. She's a smart marketer, and it's a good article.
But as a recently single person with more alone time on my hands than is probably healthy, I've been finding myself perusing the evil side of craigslist--the personal ads. Now, don't get me wrong, I am in no way looking for a date--I am not even close to ready for that yet. But I thought it would be entertaining, so away I went. Now I feel a little bit like puking (thankfully I'm NOT looking to date yet, or I would probably actually BE puking). I thought I would share with you, my readers, some of the gems I found there (warning--profanity follows so read no further if that is going to bother you).
Let's start with the headlines. Here are some really great ones (please note sarcasm):
“looking for girlfriend/roommate--free rent!” Umm...creepy.
“let’s do some shit” Yeah, let's do some shit! You sound so intelligent!
“Must have kids--single moms only” Now, this person may be sincere, but as a single mom I find that more than a little creepy.
“I am bored--wanna chat?” You are bored. That sounds really boring.
Now for some fantastic content:
“I am 420 friendly. I have a criminal background. I want a down-ass woman. I don’t drive.”
“I am with someone right now but that has run its course.”
This one doesn't deserve a comment. I hope his girlfriend isn't looking.
“I am a Bible-based Disciple. I am looking for a friend: A Bible-based, God-seeking Christian, preferably slim.”
Okay, so I understand if you are really fit and you want the same from a partner, but really. Some women look fabulous at 200 pounds. Either way, must you be a jerk about it?
“195 lbs of prime beef”
“I am cursed! Fat women find me irresistible. I’m looking for someone fit, attractive, and understands that I am cursed and how I can break it.”
This was almost the entire ad. I get it. You want someone fit and attractive. Do you give a crap about the personality of your partner? Good luck, asshole.
“If you need help with bills or like being spoiled, I am your sugar daddy. If you can host, I like big girls, the bigger the better.”
This WAS the entire ad. Do YOU give a crap about personality or brains or anything else? You are at least as much of a jerk as the last guy.
Okay, so I admit, there are decent-sounding guys on there too. But their ads are so boring I can't even read all the way through them. Maybe I am just a jerk, too. Oh, and while I'm bashing people--why do men (I use that term lightly) on myspace think they can email me with things like, "yo, I saw your pix, u r so hot." Don't you even have anything interesting to say at all?!? Disgusting.